7 WONDERS OF KENYAN UNIVERSITIES

KU--exceptional varsity where students burn everything, anything and even themselves as a form of demonstration...
Masinde Muliro--The remarkable place where engineering is taught by Non-Engineering tyro staffs. Just but to mention a few...


SEVEN WONDERS OF KENYAN UNIVERSITIES; Six (6) Marks. . .
GM Son.

After taking a choreographed research, the shockingly leading place where the steamy harmonized constitution has not been read totally, is in our varsities. I tried toying around with this hypothesis, only to collide with the cold fact that students are either reading specifically for CATs & Exams, or in debauchery. It’s ok, no complaint. But with intellectuals, the crème of the society unable to dissect such an important document, then who will? [http:// http://www.magati2020.blogspot.com/ ] The greedy pigs in parliament?
This jolted me going into overdrive to divulge the hidden wonders of Kenyan universities. And the tit-bits here given are absolute truths and personal views as a well-rounded magat in the class of magats:-

(1). the University of Nairobi
MODULES—MWAKENYA—ZEBRA—FACEBOOK
· So far the varsity that has phenomenally more parallel than regular students in the name of “running the university” money-wise. They say it’s academically correct!?
· Is the chief university monumentally known with the inveterate “mwaks”- mania. From Exam cookery to bedroom class the byword is “miss yours miss out”. The rest is …hysteria.
· The locale where students believe it’s the vehicle that is supposed to stop at a zebra-crossing, look its left or right before passing safely lest it risk being knocked dead by the students.
· Has busiest students. Busy in facebook: poking, commenting “we’re the best…” Now, how?

(2). KU
DEMONSTRATION—UNIFORM—NOISEMAKERS
· (Kibera University, Oh! no, no Kuja Uharibiwe) is the exceptional varsity where students burn everything, anything and even themselves as a form of demonstration.
· The only institution introducing uniforms like the garbs for nuns and catechists.
· Hold dear the inclination of writing “noise-makers” in the lecture halls and forwarding them to the VC (the moles-agency 4 Mugenda).

(3). JKUAT
MULTICOURSES—HOSTELS—OBAMAs
· Only where one course is made many courses. Studying different courses in a single mode and a like lectures until graduation. [e.g. they can have, cup engineering, mug engineering, water-in-cup engineering, cup-less engineering]
· Where hostels reek like DDS (dandora dumping site) save for Skyline hostel.
· Still use pit latrines. It’s a biogas plant! Green (leaves) Technology, they say. No need of TPs (no offence)
· Gentle-lads (read Juja boys) impregnate small girls in the varsity outskirts. Invention they call it (another Obama, might come!!)

(4). Masinde-Muliro
DRESS—TYROS—COMPUTER
· The male students wear knife-cut shorts and the ladies put on checkered knee-down dresses. Make-up is prohibited, try one & you are a prostitute.
· The remarkable place where engineering is taught by Non-Engineering tyro staffs. Just but to mention a few.
· Presence or availability of three fully working computers, and no more. One for the undergraduates, another for the dean, and the other for pro.

(5). Maseno
RATIONING—I.T
· Students don’t know what is rationing because they depend heavily on charcoal and firewood for cooking, warming rooms, etc (Lwela Village?) Cylinders are for “sonkos”, i.e. those whose boyfs own “ngware” or “peng’” or men with fishing nets.
· Every student is trained how to use Microsoft Word, Excel, and Powerpoint. That’s I.T…(Information Technology; period) Intellectually trained!

(6). MOI
LINCENTIOUS
· Ranked soaringly immoral place with Annex being… after Moi Avenue’s S.J.
· Their dogmas are: books=sex, and campus=cohabitation

(7). EGERTON
THE CHALLENGE
· The only reason students study “hard” despite the gloomy environment, is anticipation of participating in Celtel Challenge, Oops sorry, Zain Challenge or maybe Celzan Challenge next.
WEUCOST? Varsity?
By Gati Mae Son (Ma-Gati Alphonce)
Reason Cain killed Abel in the Bible: They were roommates, Cain a BA and Abel an Engineer student.
Peace