7 WONDERS OF KENYAN UNIVERSITIES

KU--exceptional varsity where students burn everything, anything and even themselves as a form of demonstration...
Masinde Muliro--The remarkable place where engineering is taught by Non-Engineering tyro staffs. Just but to mention a few...


SEVEN WONDERS OF KENYAN UNIVERSITIES; Six (6) Marks. . .
GM Son.

After taking a choreographed research, the shockingly leading place where the steamy harmonized constitution has not been read totally, is in our varsities. I tried toying around with this hypothesis, only to collide with the cold fact that students are either reading specifically for CATs & Exams, or in debauchery. It’s ok, no complaint. But with intellectuals, the crème of the society unable to dissect such an important document, then who will? [http:// http://www.magati2020.blogspot.com/ ] The greedy pigs in parliament?
This jolted me going into overdrive to divulge the hidden wonders of Kenyan universities. And the tit-bits here given are absolute truths and personal views as a well-rounded magat in the class of magats:-

(1). the University of Nairobi
MODULES—MWAKENYA—ZEBRA—FACEBOOK
· So far the varsity that has phenomenally more parallel than regular students in the name of “running the university” money-wise. They say it’s academically correct!?
· Is the chief university monumentally known with the inveterate “mwaks”- mania. From Exam cookery to bedroom class the byword is “miss yours miss out”. The rest is …hysteria.
· The locale where students believe it’s the vehicle that is supposed to stop at a zebra-crossing, look its left or right before passing safely lest it risk being knocked dead by the students.
· Has busiest students. Busy in facebook: poking, commenting “we’re the best…” Now, how?

(2). KU
DEMONSTRATION—UNIFORM—NOISEMAKERS
· (Kibera University, Oh! no, no Kuja Uharibiwe) is the exceptional varsity where students burn everything, anything and even themselves as a form of demonstration.
· The only institution introducing uniforms like the garbs for nuns and catechists.
· Hold dear the inclination of writing “noise-makers” in the lecture halls and forwarding them to the VC (the moles-agency 4 Mugenda).

(3). JKUAT
MULTICOURSES—HOSTELS—OBAMAs
· Only where one course is made many courses. Studying different courses in a single mode and a like lectures until graduation. [e.g. they can have, cup engineering, mug engineering, water-in-cup engineering, cup-less engineering]
· Where hostels reek like DDS (dandora dumping site) save for Skyline hostel.
· Still use pit latrines. It’s a biogas plant! Green (leaves) Technology, they say. No need of TPs (no offence)
· Gentle-lads (read Juja boys) impregnate small girls in the varsity outskirts. Invention they call it (another Obama, might come!!)

(4). Masinde-Muliro
DRESS—TYROS—COMPUTER
· The male students wear knife-cut shorts and the ladies put on checkered knee-down dresses. Make-up is prohibited, try one & you are a prostitute.
· The remarkable place where engineering is taught by Non-Engineering tyro staffs. Just but to mention a few.
· Presence or availability of three fully working computers, and no more. One for the undergraduates, another for the dean, and the other for pro.

(5). Maseno
RATIONING—I.T
· Students don’t know what is rationing because they depend heavily on charcoal and firewood for cooking, warming rooms, etc (Lwela Village?) Cylinders are for “sonkos”, i.e. those whose boyfs own “ngware” or “peng’” or men with fishing nets.
· Every student is trained how to use Microsoft Word, Excel, and Powerpoint. That’s I.T…(Information Technology; period) Intellectually trained!

(6). MOI
LINCENTIOUS
· Ranked soaringly immoral place with Annex being… after Moi Avenue’s S.J.
· Their dogmas are: books=sex, and campus=cohabitation

(7). EGERTON
THE CHALLENGE
· The only reason students study “hard” despite the gloomy environment, is anticipation of participating in Celtel Challenge, Oops sorry, Zain Challenge or maybe Celzan Challenge next.
WEUCOST? Varsity?
By Gati Mae Son (Ma-Gati Alphonce)
Reason Cain killed Abel in the Bible: They were roommates, Cain a BA and Abel an Engineer student.
Peace

8-4-4 SYSYTEM, A WASTE OF TIME AND MONEY. yes!



8-4-4 discharges



"our education system needs an overhaul. In a bid to tailor full-baked graduates, notes-oriented, and cram-sensitizing quizzes termed as exams, and an obsessive culture of standardized testing should be stopped. Otherwise, the result is a disastrous waste of talent among students. To sense the scale of this disaster, you only have to look at the plummeting value of college degree and the corresponding wastrels. Look at what it takes to acquire a paper (degree): either good looks or good money! It may sound miraculous, like the high school noted above, that a student can read a whole semester syllabus in just two final weeks and pass; but it’s not impossible in Kenya. We can’t pretend that we don’t need a system that drills practical skills; how to rise up to real life challenges. But this can be cultivated and nurtured when the university exams will be open-ended, open-book, open-minded..".

HOW 8-4-4 SYSTEM STIFFLES TALENT & CREATIVITY WITH IMPUNITYhttpThe impunity mercury in Kenya is rising too little too fast. From the depths of classroom with papers to the peaks of Ministry of Education with coffers, impunity is becoming the order of the day. Much as the president’s agenda to fight corruption is perfectly rhetorical, we feel much short-changed when a corrupt minister pigeonholes the call to step-down as a political gimmickry aiming to put him down and walks away with a wagging finger. It further pains Kenyans on realizing that we can’t realize the much coveted vision 2030 if we play around with education. I cannot overemphasize the correlation between food security and good education, but these two are universally principal pillars for any auspicious future for any upcoming nation. The recent two or three incidents of immunity are clear statements, harbinger and iteration of the vicious circle of corruption we yet to meet. Only time and good heavens will tell more.

Technically speaking, I am not at all haranguing because civility and intellectualism advises me to do otherwise, instead I am being part of the solution I want to see. My major concern, though, despite the aforementioned anomaly, is the credibility of our current education system. For the lack of reality check, no questions have been asked, no answers given, and therefore no precise prediction of where our students are headed. Were it not that I am undergoing the same system, I could have easily passed for a rancorous politician manipulating things for egocentric end. But truth be told, our exam-oriented education system is overly wanting. Why? Read on.

Every year our education system discharges nearly over 340, 000 pupils; only 81, 000 are above average (C+ and above), out of which 18, 000 can get government sponsorship in public varsities. This means, by simple math, over 260, 000 students are rendered useless; rather uselessly valuable given our state of economy. The frustration, anger and upheaval etched out of such mishit can snowball into nasty occurrence to these future generations if something is not done expeditiously.

It’s indefensible that Kenyan education system is the most grilling compared to the rest of the developed world, yet it’s the only one fruitless to its protégé. The other day a local school was strutting of finishing a whole syllabus of four years in less than two years. I got lost; how, for goodness sake can that happen? This and many other porous faults, faults like arid approach of teaching, lack of simple application, no life-skills, and encouragement of penultimate cramming speak volumes of how we are in a non-moving lane. But that can be cut and customized for the better of Kenyan students and the Kenya we want. Here is the face of my reasoning.

Like putting all one’s eggs in one basket, it’s dangerous to depend on one final examination as a form of testing intelligence. Instead, KNEC should endeavor to introduce end-year exams for every class; from form one, form two, form three, and form four, which shall then be used to obtain a weighted mean (average). This way we will be eliminating the single-wrong-move blunders that cost life and death. Equally, we will be minimizing impersonations and the choreographed “once-or-never” exam irregularities. Such mistakes leave both parents and students never the same again. The challenge to Hon. Ongeri, therefore, is to respond with immediacy and wisdom of King Solomon.

But the problem doesn’t end there. As far as varsities remain the apple of many Kenyans’ eyes, we are still in the maze. Campus itself is full of losers who can’t make out this or that simply because paper-work is uplifted and talent stifled vastly. My sentiments, stating what should be inevitable and non-negotiable; our education system needs an overhaul. In a bid to tailor full-baked graduates, notes-oriented, and cram-sensitizing quizzes termed as exams, and an obsessive culture of standardized testing should be stopped. Otherwise, the result is a disastrous waste of talent among students. To sense the scale of this disaster, you only have to look at the plummeting value of college degree and the corresponding wastrels. Look at what it takes to acquire a paper (degree): either good looks or good money! It may sound miraculous, like the high school noted above, that a student can read a whole semester syllabus in just two final weeks and pass; but it’s not impossible in Kenya. We can’t pretend that we don’t need a system that drills practical skills; how to rise up to real life challenges. But this can be cultivated and nurtured when the university exams will be open-ended, open-book, open-minded ensuring one applies what one has learnt the whole semester. Not the asking of the plastic repetition of notes but the insight-jolting type of tests. Amen, is what I am hearing from Dr. Sally Kosgey.

Nevertheless, don’t misquote me, waste of creativity, innovation and talent isn’t deliberate but it is systematic. Trapped by education policies, many of which misunderstand the problem as well as the solution, a commercial interest in mass testing is the core value. The catastrophe is that fulfilling the many social, environmental, economic and spiritual challenges we now face hinges on the very capacities of creativity and insight that these systems are systematically suppressing in yet another generation of young men and women.

We are caught up in changing times, where change is a must-have. We are caught up in a cultural and economic revolution, where status quo should be un-kept. To do this, despite the unpredictability, we need to revolutionize the culture of education: Starting from the subjects or course structures to teaching approach and testing styles. Our education should aim at offering real solutions. An education that cannot accomplish this is as good as dead (ours is at its deathbed confessing). The answer, therefore, is to personalize and customize it to the needs of each growing person in the community. It’s not gender, it’s not Facebook, it’s not soap opera floods on our TVs, neither is it the towel issue, nor is it the school-ranking tussle. Simply stated, step by step assessment for high schools, and real-life challenge drills for varsities and colleges is the way forward. After all, grades are not the only success yardstick, there is more. Have a successfully creative day, and you don’t need a retreat to agree on this.

ALPHONCE M. MAGAT

UNIVESITY OF NAIROBI